Childhood sexual abuse appears to be “that” which cannot be mentioned. In our society the subject is taboo like no other. Childhood sexual abuse is indeed evil and detestable but people need to realize that talking about it is not. Victims need to talk about it in order to heal; (sometimes ad nauseam). Society needs to listen with compassion and learn. By becoming better informed, an awareness of potentially abusive people or situations might be developed.
Anything that is human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone. – Fred Rogers
To talk about childhood sexual abuse is to admit that it really happens. It fills us with disgust and makes us feel sick. Sometimes hearing about a particular victim’s perpetrator gives us pause and causes us to squirm, because we wonder, “Is it wrong for us to blame this person when there is no actual proof?” We might even jump ahead and think, “What if someone were to blame me or someone in my family of something horrible like that?!” I believe that this is a device used by the enemy to silence us. If we are unwilling to hear about or talk about this subject then the devil succeeds at keeping this issue in the dark. (Where it quietly spreads like toxic black mold.)
Childhood sexual abuse is too much…too much for the healthy mind to absorb. In the case of incest, who can fathom that the very family God provided for protection would use their own child as a sexual object?
All the same, there were things that were not supposed to be. They offended any sane person’s sense of order. – Stephen King, (IT)
Silence is never an encouragement to one who has shown vulnerability by exposing their story. There are times I have been met with silence. It might be the listener was too shocked to speak and could think of no response. Maybe they were trying to remain neutral? In my head I think, “They don’t believe me.” (“I’m sorry” is usually a safe response. Tears are even better.)
Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. – Elie Wiesel
Only by talking and listening can any type of abuse be brought out into the light. Then, all can benefit; (even the perpetrators). We need to get it out of our minds that only “monsters” abuse and that we would “surely recognize a monster.”
God’s word does not shy away from exposing hard stories…including those of sexual abuse. He shows us that abuse is not to remain a secret. I pray for all of us…that we learn how to stay present, and by listening give honor to the abuse that people have endured.
Let us kick at the darkness until the light shines through.
We are children of the light; we do not belong to the darkness.
The Last Battle Blog aims to provide meaningful tools and information about the issue of sexual violation. We offer a way to express yourself, as you engage in your own personal awareness and share your strengths with others. Our goal is to cover a variety of topics, stories, ideas, and to create a blog that is beneficial and honoring to those who read it. Last Battle’s contributing authors help make this happen.